Friday, October 30, 2009

My Real Prognosis!

Well my family doctor didn't give much of a prognosis. He admitted never having anyone 37yrs old with Non hodgkins Lymphoma (NHL). Anyhow Yesterday Oct 29, 2009 I visited the London Cancer clinic for my first appointment. I brought my mom and my wife. It was nice to have them there! My wife has been great because she advocates for me quite well. She was very nervous as was I while we sat in the waiting room but she put on the brave face. My mom she hurts I can see that she's scared for me. I have 2 little daughters. All I can think when I'm in the cancer clinic is that I'm glad I got cancer and not my daughters. So for my mom to watch her son with cancer is hard.
Next I do some bloodwork followed by more waiting. Finally we are called into an examination room. Next I meet the oncologist Dr. Chin Yee he does an examination of me. Then he sits down a proceeds to explain my prognosis. For an hour and half my wife spews out questions. He anwsers everyone carefully and detailed. I realize after he leaves the room that I didn't hear one question or any of his anwsers. I was to busy thinking of my girls without dad... I heard 8 yrs so I thought I had eight yrs to live. I looked over after Dr Chin Yee had let the room. My mom and wife looked happy. I thought 8 yrs must be ok with them. I said, "What do you think?". My mom said she was hopeful. Jen seemed very satisfied to. Man oh Man bring people with for these kinds of appointments. Basically this is what I have learned since. Don't hold me to this because it's all new as of now. I have Follicular Non Hodgkins Lymphoma grade 3a. This is where it get's confusing. There's 4 stages of this lymphoma 1,2,3,and 4.... 1&2 being the slower growing and 3&4 being the more agressive. Grade 3 also has an a&b myself having 3a. You actually want the more agressive cancer. Grade 3 responds well to chemo and once in remission tends to stay in remission for a long time. If it does come back it's very treatable with chemo again. Where as 1&2 doesn't react as well to chemo and tends not to stay in remission as long. When it comes back it's harder to treat each time. Grade 3a means I'm in the middle and they won't know if it will react as a 2 or a 3. Let's hope it will act as a 3.

Thursday, October 29, 2009

My Diagnosis Story!

I think I need to explain how I came to my diagnosis. One night in August 2009 I went into the bathroom to shave my face. I lifted my arm up and noticed I had a lump under my armpit... SH%T it was huge like half an orange hanging from my armpit. How in the world did I not notice that... Called my wife up to look at it and she freaked... So within a week I had an appointment with my family Dr. He said that he beleived it was a cyst but was concerned with the size of it. No kidding it's huge! He proceeded to order blood test,chest x rays, and ultrasound... I went on google as well as my wife and pretty much self diagnosed myself with cancer,lupus,heart diease,hiv,mad cow,and anything else that could kill you. I thought I had it all combined (so don't google lumps under your armpit). I went for my blood work and chest xray the next day. About a week later I had been at the doctors with my daughter for her appointment and asked him about my blood work. He said it all had come back good and he had still thought it was just a cyst. About a week or two later I had my ultrasound... That's when I became scared. The radiologist who came in to view my ultrasound started checking my other armpit my chest,neck,and abdomen. Holy shit he was calm but I could feel he was freaking. "Have you ever had a diease before?", he asked. I don't thinks so... Another week or so went by and my wife and I went to the family doctor to find out hopefully it was just a cyst. When we had got there the Doc still didn't have the results. He told me he'd call me as soon as he did. I went for a nap and was woke by his call. It's the lymphnodes he told me they're enlarged in both armpits... Just fliping great! Now what? More test... My family doc tells me the next step is a biopsy. 2 types a needle biopsy or surgery where they would cut my armpit open to take a chunk to send for testing. He said he would order a needle biopsy for me since they are much quicker... My wife God bless her took action into her own hands. Basically with the help of her friend Steph got me a needle biopsy within 2 weeks. The doctor who did the needle biopsy was fantastic. He sure poked me alot. 10 days later the family doctor calls he has my results. I wasn't panicked because he told me good or bad he'd call me in to explain the results. Tuesday Oct 20 2009 10:45am we go to the doctor he comes in the room to inform me that I have Non Hodgkins grade 3 follicular lymphoma. The room went still my body stayed in the chair but my soul rose out of my body and floated to the ceiling. I could see my face and my wifes horror and disbelief as she attacked the doctor with what seemed like violent questions. I won't be able to see my daughters grow up I could cry right now. Prognosis: 5-10 yrs lots of chemo... 37 yrs old and cancer Mother F#$ker why me? Followed by lots of crying. talk to wife cry, talk to mom cry, talk to dad cry, sister cry, 2 brothers cry, mother in law cry, father in law cry, cry,cry,cry. Think of my girls and I cry twice as hard. Do you get the picture?